i'm currently an agnostic and seeking a direction
Excellent Hydrassas! I feel sure that you will find it, be it here, within you, or elsewhere - and maybe all 3!
I don't know if this will help you, Hydrassas, but I have learned that the place of being direction-less is the best of all places to find your "next step".
You are perhaps familiar with the quote "
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step!
". Well, it is franky rubbish! The best journeys begin at the place of "emptiness" - the place of having NO next step, the place of where our last "direction" has fizzled out. This is a powerful place to be.Headless Chicken!
Avoid any temptation to rush around desperately like a headless chicken. Key ingredients [but NOT the whole pudding!] lie within you - stop, breathe, feel. So many people rushed into a new direction based on "WHAT I DON'T WANT" or "WHAT MY SHORT-SIGHTED INSECURE EGO WANTS" rather than what will really nourish and fulfil my life and lead to that inevitable death where I might honestly be able to say "I've lived and savoured this life to the full, and it's now time to move on!"
If you want a shallow experience, start your new direction from the shallow place of "conscious mind". If you want a deeper, richer, more fulfilling life, you need to dig down into the deeper, richer resources of "conscious mind". Shamanism offers many techniques for doing this, and there are techniques from other disciplines too, including psychotherapy. You could explore a few, and find what works for you.The Power of Now!
[see also "Power of Now" Resources
What energies move within you right now? What is your breath doing? Do you want a "next direction" that is driven by fear, craving, escape from the past, escape from yourself, or desperation? If so, get going now with the headless chicken thing, and reap what you sow.
If you want a direction and harvest that contains more nourishing and fulfilling energies, stick with your negative energies until they change. Breathe them, feel them, share them [preferably with advice-less companions - be they human, animal, sky, river, mountain or plant], express them in art, poetry, dance or destructiveness [inner or outer cleansing/purifcation], also occasionally "Letting Go
" or Meditating without them - and look out for the new buds of hope, soul-longing, inspiration and "inner-knowing" to emerge!Healing the Past
If this "Power of Now" journey is blocked by elements in your "personal shadow", find a healer to help you - for if we don't learn and grow from our past, we are destined to repeat it, and there will be no "new direction"!Teachers & Travelling Companions
If you wish to journey to new experiences, you will need new resources from both within and outside. If your journey is to progress you will inner and outer guides, role models and travelling companions. When these flow naturally into your life you wil know that you are "on track", when the flow stops, this is a sign that you need to revisit the "first principles" mentioned above.
There needs to be some kind of energy exchange in any type of Shamanic encounter
I tend to go with Jusma on this one. Although I would never, ever withold stress management, healing or shamanic services from someone in genuine need who could not afford my fees, I do find that up-front mention of fees act as a useful "filter" to screen out the casual "tourists", the energy vampires and the parasitic-lifestyle people. Do I want to encourage my disempowered brothers and sisters to stay trapped in these ungrounded, dependency lifestyles - certainly not!
I no longer waste my time, experience and efforts with folks who are not taking mature responsibility for their own lives. I see my role as essentially a training one and I know that people do not experience sustainable learning without 3 essential ingredients [in addition to the humility necessary for knocking on the door to training]:
A: RESPECT FOR THE TRAINER
[including the trainer's energy]
that comes from taking personal reponsibility
so that personal energy resources are not constantly dissipated
I am also aware of that old adage "If you pay peanuts, expect to employ monkeys!
" - Providing quality services and keeping onself and one's facilities "up to the mark" does require financial support. I prefer to obtain that support from the recipients where possible, rather than being parasitic on hard-working taxpayers.