I am new to this site and am in need of knowledge from shamans. I ask this group for help due to the fact that what I am experiencing is from an altered state induced by Cannabis.
I am 20 and have smoke pot for about 4 years. It was all normal-esque getting high until I learned how to meditate. I have now been meditating regularly for a year and a half. The discovery of inner space drastically changed what would happen when I became high. Through sober/high mediation and sober/high Qi-gong(An ancient chinese art of breathing) I believe I have created some sort of superior mode of functioning.
The process of becoming high opens and expands my lower abdomen and allows my breath to reach down to an energetic connection in front of my sacrum. Once my breath has reached this point my body fills with energy and I emanate power. I have extremely high levels of kinesthetic awareness, can easily tell what a person is thinking and my blood flow increases. My brain processes information quicker and my reaction time is greatly increased.
When I meditate high I go within quickly and in a different direction that normal sober meditation takes me. I have met entities 2 times while high and meditating. It is as if the Cannabis has a predetermined destination that it wants me to go to and takes me there fast. Really fast.
Some of the most terrifying experiences I have ever had were from smoking marijuana and meditating as it plunges me into my subconscious at an alarming rate. The reason I continued this is because if I got through the experience I integrated more into my conscious mind.
The real problem is that I am now struggling to function outside of this state in my sober state of consciousness. I have cut my smoking down to once every two weeks because I think this state is too advanced from my normal state and if I do not advance my normal state I will die? Not necessarily physically but it feels as though my energetic body or my psyche will die. I feel weak, with no energy and struggle to concentrate most of the time.
One way I have found to get more energy during my daily life (and thereby feel somewhat alive) is to maintain awareness on my breath and maintaining a rhythmic deep abdomen type breath.
I come to the shamans of this website because of the fact that my advancements have been attained during an altered state during a drug. Does anyone know how to help integrate developed powers/ advances into your sober state? I really need help and any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you thank you thank you