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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Sun Mar 24, 2013 11:06 am 
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This morning I dream I'm in a cafeteria setting with a handful of people, Prince William, and the Dutchess of Cambridge. She's looking quite pregnant. Even in the dream I'm not quite sure what I'm doing there, among these people. I feel excited to be around the royal couple, but not overly, so it's pleasant. After socializing with others in the room I take a seat on the sofa. There are already two people sitting and there is just enough room for one more. After taking my seat, the Dutchess crams herself onto the sofa, and being so slim, even though pregnant, she manages to fit. I decide to get up and let her have the seat. I would have done that for any pregnant woman though.

Next thing I know, the Dutchess and I are walking down a corridor together. She's on her way to bed, and seemed to want to discuss something with me, so I walked her to the door of her bedroom. When I turn around to leave, I see her lady in waiting who was walking behind us. She's dressed in red. It's funny because I can't remember what the Dutchess or I wore.

Afterward, I drift back into my obscure life with only a hazy recall of being in rooms that were in need of some kind of repair, although now I can't remember which rooms or what needed doing.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Tue Mar 26, 2013 10:24 am 
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I saw the young guy yesterday, the one I mentioned earlier. He's looking more and more fragile every time I see him - physically and spiritually.

I had occassion to see the top of his head yesterday as well. It was the same as the tops of the heads I saw in the dream I recorded here, where I walked into a room and chanting ensued.

I wanted to ignore him, but waved cordially and moved on quickly.

I don't recall any dreams last night. But early this morning I was awake for a little bit. I closed my eyes, and saw a brilliant orange flash. It was slow enough, that it almost wasn't a flash. I could perceive the light building, then dimming, but very quickly. When it's a real flash, it happens to fast to be aware of any changes. I get real flashes, and they are always stark white. This is my first orange one.

Anyway, I went back to sleep. I felt, for the first time ever, a distinct feeling of separating from my body, and rising quickly and uncontrollably to the ceiling. My first thought was "I guess I'm dead now" and my second thought was "where are my cats?" I looked down, but couldn't see anything, just a haze.

What the deuce is going on????

I feel fine now though. No after effects.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Fri Mar 29, 2013 10:30 am 
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As for the orange and white flashes, I guess It's time to get my eyes checked - again. I read that this is normal for aging eyes, but there's still a risk of retinal tearing. Don't want that.

Last night I dreamt my invisible man was giving me all kinds of instructions about sex, with a preference for doing it in the closet. I seemed to go along unquestioningly. But there was an angry woman's head hovering and lurking around the premises, yelling, chiding, and otherwise ruining al the "fun".

I woke up. I think I might be closing in on who the invisible man might be. It's either my departed husband, or someone from my childhood, who gave me all kinds of instructions about how to please him in that way and definitely wanted the whole thing kept secret. I'm inclined to think it's the latter.

Since the invisible man is showing up in so many of my dreams lately, it's just a matter of time before I know who he is.

I have had the feeling that he's waiting for me to cross over, but if it is who I think it is, I don't want him around me, ever.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Mon Apr 01, 2013 3:56 pm 
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I have a clue. Well, maybe more than a clue. There are things I'm seeing in my day to day life that are anchoring into my psyche and playing themsleves out in dreams.

Up until I met my now deceased husband, my life was plagued with nightmares, night terrors, sleep paralysis a-plenty - several times a week to several times a month, minimum, until that point. After marriage there was an abrupt cessation of dream recall and other night experiences. A few now and then, but long stretches of restful nothing.

With respect to sleep paralysis, I want to add that for me, it was an extremely painful experience physically., except not phsysically. Whenever it happened, I felt an indescribable agony along the vertebre near the nape of the neck, but the pain wasn't exactly physical. It was nevertheless excruciating. I would feel that, along with complete paralysis. In order to snap out of it, I trained myself to remember to move just one finger, or toe. If I could move just one thing, I could bring myself right out. I got pretty good at that.

I have been amazed that sleep paralysis has not accompanied these experiences, and definitely am not missing the spinal tap.

Much of the Shaman's material has anchored into my psyche and has played out in the astral world, as well as dreams.

Dreams seem very much different than the astral world, which I also encounter in sleep.

Dreams leave shadowy traces in your waking mind, while astral travel leaves a vivid impression on every level, when awake.

Then theres the narrative that seems to play in the background, so it seems like I've been a sponge for his material.

Is he the invisible man? If he is, then he's been with me since 2010, so he anchored long ago, then, the astral encounter, then a series of astral encounters and dreams with the invisible man.

I have to be honest, I thought he was my twin flame for awhile, as super improbable as that might seem to everyone, myself included.

But now I have to wonder if he's aware that his material has that effect, and on whom?

I'm having deja vous. I never get that.

If he is aware, is there a formula?

I haven't been to the astral world since I recorded my out of body experience.

The dream in which I suddenly found myself flat on my back, in the backyard was also an astral world experience as opposed to a dream.

The dream about the closet etc. was a just a dream.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 4:43 pm 
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I was awoken, well before dawn, by a crow. I have communication with all the crows in town, but that's another story.

When crows call at night, they're risking their lives. It wasn't an alarm call, and I assumed it was for me, because it woke me up out of a deep sleep.

When the crows are calling me specifically, I feel it right in the heart and solar plexus. I can often feel them coming up behind me in flight. I turn and look and sure enough, there they are.

I tried to whistle back, but couldn't for some reason. Just as well, as it would not have been in the crow's best interest for me to do that.

I didn't feel that the crow or his cronies were in any danger, but it felt like a "heads up."

Today, I saw the man in the silver truck drive by. The man I reported seeing in a dream awhile back, on this thread. The married man who was good at grammar, and who, in the dream, had stopped by to warn me of a gun brandishing maniac in the neighbourhood. In the dream I had the sense of being targeted by this nut.

So I'm waiting for the shoe to drop.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 5:22 pm 
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I wanted to add that the dream of the gun brandishing maniac was an astral experience.

Maybe it's significant progress that I can tell the difference, since astral experiences seem to be taking such prominence right now.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:50 pm 
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I should mention the gun toting lunatic was a short, fat, guy. But not asian. I guess I wonder if the threat was against me, or if it pertains to ratification of a nulear strike against the U.S. by North Korea.

Today while I was working out, about 10 crows gathered in the tallest tree across the street, perched ominously on the branches, clearly waiting for me to stop and pay attention. So I turned off the music, opened the front door, sat down on the floor so that I could be near the screen, and waited for the crows to speak. They all did, one at a time. Each called in turn. I called back. The first to call, flew off after I answered, the second, third, fourth, and so on cerimoniously followed suit.

Then they flew in patterns, and landed in patterns in the trees. I think they wanted me to notice that as well, but my attention started wandering by then.

They've stuck with me for two years now. I must be their most promising student, because I'm learning both their vocal language and body language, albeit excurciatingly slowly. I must be the best human entertainment they've got.

Is there a link between the crows and possibly ending up in the throws of war?

Still waiting for the shoe to fall.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Thu Apr 04, 2013 3:08 pm 
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This has nothing to do with dreams. Don't recall anything from last night, except one huge gust of wind blowing past my front door, that woke me up.

The crows are immitating my voice. They were flying around my head and calling out to me in what sounded just like I sound when I'm trying to immitate them.

I think it's official. We are now aware that we are trying to learn how to talk to one another, through dancing, flying, and actual talking, albeit in a different language.

They have their language common to them, but I think they're learning a different one for me.

We shall see.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 8:38 am 
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I recall a brief but vivid dream of the non astral realm variety (at least as I experience the astral realm), where the Shaman and I are running and laughing hand and hand along a corridor, with our other arm stretched out, as if we were trying to take flight together. When I woke up the cats were all playing together, having a ball. Very inconvenient as it was way before dawn. I couldn't get them to stop, but I managed to get back to sleep regardless.

This has been a long, strange patch, but the ominousness seems to have passed, and I'm back to feeling happy.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Fri Apr 05, 2013 3:29 pm 
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The crows were telling me whom they were OK with today, and whom they were not OK with. The same people I'm not OK with. These people don't know how I feel about them, but all they have to do is look at me, and I know how they feel about me.

I guess it's no mystery why I'm looked at with such consternation. I'm new, and I refuse to lift a finger to fit in. At the same time, I am very polite, very considerate, and very friendly, or moderately friendly, whatever the situation warrants, but I go no further.

I didn't intend for it to always be this way, just until I got myself oriented, but that seems to be taking too long for everyone's liking, and many are showing their hostility openly.

I've talked to the police about this, and the police seem to be driving by my home a bit more frequently. They took my concern seriously, even though it wasn't an official complaint.

Of course, this hasn't made me any more friends than I had before, and so the merry go round commences again.

I could move, but I wonder if the crows would follow me to the next place?

I realize I want to live somewhere where I can see the stars at night, so that makes me determined to either stick it out here, or go somewhere where I can see the stars at night...

Maybe Somewhere in Saskatchewan - or Medicine Hat Aberta. That would be fitting.

There's still Costa Rica, but now that winter is melting, I'm starting to love it again.

About crows and other birds, they are telepathic, but especially crows. I've known that for a long time now, and I believe the crows here followed me from that last place.

I did see an Alpine Chough here as well as in the last place, and they are not indigenous to North America at all, but to Northern Europe, down into northern Africa.

Before I even spotted it the first time, in the last place, I had a dream that I saw it perched in a tree. I awoke just as I was reaching out to him...

I'll finish that story another day.

Maybe the crow stories will weave in with my dreams and day to day life.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Sat Apr 06, 2013 3:57 pm 
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The crows were daring me, and maybe even pleading with me to give the signal to give a show to the people who gather at the community centre across the street, but I refused. I'm starting to get a feeling for what they want. They love mischief, and they wanted to make mischief for those people. I want us all to stay unharmed. They refrained.

My telepathy is growing in leaps and bounds these days. It's not pleasant when it comes to how that applies to most of the people around me, but I'll get used to it. Right now it's another adjustment. Thank God I don't have to interact with people in town on a regular basis yet, and if I play my cards right, I never will.

Really time to get to work on that. Really.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Sun Apr 07, 2013 9:28 am 
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I'm wondering what's with all the sex dreams?? They seem to have cropped up from out of nowhere.

Over these last few months, especially when I first started recording my dreams here I awoke, sometimes several times a night in the "throes".

For awhile it didn't matter if I was asleep or not, I was on the verge all the time, no matter what. Thinking about baseball, running my errands, it didn't matter. It took all the self control I had not to erupt whilst going about my business.

I'm not a pagan or wiccan, but desperation drove me to enact "spells" to make it stop, and it stopped.

This still crops up in my dreams frequently, but nowhere near the intensity of earlier.

I have more self control in my dreams. I say "no" in my dreams and it doesn't happen.

You would think that it would be an enviable state, but it isn't. It isn't just the sexual centres that are being acted upon, but the emotional ones as well, and when this goes on for weeks, it's actually harrowing.

Anyway, in this dream there were two men. No idea who they were and I couldn't see them. We were all in bed together and just about to commence in merry making when I said "I can't do this, it's way too intense, one of you is going to have to leave." So one left, one remained but nothing happened. I was a little disappointed.

Maybe all this means is that everything is becomming more active. Everything. It's not freaking me out anymore, but then again, it's nowhere near as intense as it was.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Mon Apr 08, 2013 12:16 pm 
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The light went on. The invisible men are my unexpressed...libido, I guess. It's not exactly what I want to say, but close enough for now. Unacknowledged as well?

At least, from 2010, something went underground and took the form of the invisible man. It was love, companionship, but something very comfortable and familiar and safe. The more I think about it, recalling the first dream featuring the invisible man, and how I felt as I sobbed on his invisible shoulder, I felt this presence had been with me my whole life.

On the other hand, it was a going joke between my late husband and I, that he was Maris, from Frasier, but I cannot remember the context of the joke anymore. Any and all humanity has been ripped away from me since his death.

These years have been an ongoing struggle to regain it, and some days, I feel too tired to bother.

Which brings me to thinking how the negativity of others starts to saturate me and take control of my thoughts, and soon my fantasies are churning out one miserable scenario after another.

These scenarios may or may not occur. When I'm strong, I'm very resilliant, but when the tide gets higher and hits more often, I get tired swimming...

But then, there's always treading water till I catch my breath. The sun invariably comes out, and one of these days I truly believe that I will find another way.

Back to the invsible men.

It's also possible that a lot of sexual energy has been projected at me, by men, over the course of my lifetime, and I have not been able to process it.

It's possible that energy has taken a spirit and life of it's own, and for a time, was king of my astral domain.

One that was rather quickly put in his place, but nevertheless creeps into my astral bed, or closet and I seem to be rather quickly coming round to dealing with it.

I think if I can manage this feat, my phobias will vanish.

I've already come so far with them in the last year and a half. I've made use of the first time in 10 years where I haven't been dealing with direct threats to my physical safety, nevermind the harrassment that plagued me both online and in my day to day life trying to survive.

The more I deteriorated, the worse it got. The more I recover, the more it abates.

Finding a face and a name for my hidden bedfellows, I believe, will help me to integrate all things that interfere with my navigation and movement through life.

At this point, for me, the question is begged: Are Shamans healed from their traumas?


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Wed Apr 10, 2013 9:41 am 
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Two dreams.

The first, I'm in a classroom, with no desk. There's a long table at the front where "teacher" sits. The teacher sitting there was the Shaman. I'm sitting on a stool by the window. He is communicating wth me telepathically. He seems to be somewhat displeased.

The second, I'm in a really amazing apartment with the last guy I dated who died. My stalker "boyfriend". We were really happy to see eachother. I guess I was very fond of him in real life, unfortunately the relatonship, for want of a better word was not a healthy one. He refused to believe that I did not want to be in this relationship and refused to leave me alone. Being very weak and vulnerable at the time, I felt the only way to get free was to leave, which is what I did... and what a mess ensued. Aaanyway...

I guess maybe the big question today, is will LOVE materialize in my life, and do I want it to? Maybe prefer my men to be invisble? Maybe I've become a big coward.

The crows... Actually I think it's been closer to three years that I've been forming a relationship with them.

About two years ago, it occurred to me to start communicating back to them with whistles.

I used to whistle for them, but they would rarely answer. But now it's as if they're waiting for it.

Yesterday I was walking home from the grocery store. One of them called out to me, so I whistled back.

About 10 of them flew out from the trees, and over my head, dividing up in patterns, calling out to me. What a sight. I completely forgot myself and it was as if I was carried up with them, even though I was on the ground. They are starting to feel like my family.

The seagulls have also been communicating with me for the same length of time, but they are not nearly as attention seeking as the crows.

I'm not sure what kind of emotions I get from the crows. I'm fascinated by them, because they are fascinated by me. But from seagulls I get much quiet love and affection. It's very touching.

One perched on the telephone pole outside my house a couple of days ago, and had a long, quiet chat with me. When they're not doing those high pitched vocalizations, they talk in what sounds like very quiet barking.

Birds and dreams...

Another thing about the intensity of love, longing, excitement, and desire, too much of those feelings kind of lead to a crash. It can be quite draining.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Sat Apr 13, 2013 10:29 am 
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Dream:

I'm living in a clean, white apartment. Plain and simple. There's a wasp. I try to kill it, but it escapes. It's a very pretty wasp, but still looks dangerous, like it could cause real pain.

Then a creature that looks like a cross between a crab and a centipede appears. I kill it by pouring hot tobasco sauce over it. I do that because I don't want to step on it, or make physical contact with it, although I do very much regret the painful death that resulted for the creature.

Overall I think this dream is positive. I think it means I'm ready to deal with obstacles and fears that impede my progress and I certainly feel that way today.


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