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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 8:53 pm 
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Posts: 184
I wanted to say a little more about the younger guy in my dream.

I bumped into him at the grocery store very recently and noticed he looked very pale.

In the dream where I found myself sitting on a roof, chatting wtih him, he was sitting on the edge, with his legs hanging over, while I was sitting quite a way back, leaning against a wall.

He didn't seem distressed, but I wondered what it meant today. I have always had an extra sense about this guy and he seems very drawn to me. It feels karmic, and my instinct is to stay away from him.

The dream seemed to be hinting that he might need my help and my feeling is that I can't help him so I want to avoid him.

I imagine more information will be forthcoming about him in the weeks to come.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Tue Feb 26, 2013 4:36 pm 
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I guess there are a lot of parallel themes running through my dreams.

I had the dream that started it all on January 20, 2013. Of that I will relay the relavent scene from that dream and the parallels that sprang up in subsequent dreams.

I am talking to the Shaman on the phone. His hand comes through the receiver and caresses my cheek. Suddenly I'm pressed up against a wall with him kissing me.

In the dream where I recounted walking into a room which was filled with men all sitting on the floor with their heads bowed, then the chanting which rendered me unconscious, then the part I didn't want to relay, let's just say I cannot see the man who has me pinned against the wall, doing non consentual things to me.

In the dream with that young guy I mentioned yesterday, he is sitting on the edge of the roof, but I am sitting with my back against a wall. Only this time, I'm not being held there against my will or without my permission, or without my knowledge, I can see the man, and he is not forcing himself on me.

Wait a minute. How did I just end up sitting on the roof with my back against a wall? One minute I'm in one dream and the very next second the scene changes and there I am, with my back against a wall, almost without my knoweldge or consent. And the guy I avoid is in my dream. Like I can't avoid him in either place. Hmmm..

Many times when we've encountered one another running our errands in this tiny town, he has forced me into conversations and I take pains to avoid him so he can't.

I have no idea what he could possibly want with me, I am at least 20 years older than he is. Even if something were to transpire, I know no good would come of it so I want to do everything I can to discourage it.

He has the same kind of effect on me as the Shaman does though. The Shaman is at a safe distance, at least geographically. I guess he liberated these energies, and these energies vibrate with like kind.

That's always been the case anyway, but this is the first time I'm really aware of it.

This all brings up the issue of my fate. Not that my fate is important in the big scheme of things, but if I could change my fate, and if I could say exactly how I accomplished it, that would be important in the big scheme of things, because I could help others with it.

The way my energy is right now, it seems my romantic fate is either to fall for a man that will annihilate me, or remain celibate, and regulate the energy so that it doesn't run counter to my interests.

I want to say that I was getting the hang of it very well, prior to January 20. Very happy with my progress, very optimistic about my future and my ability to deal with obstacles.

After the 20th, it seems I got a mega ton dose of energy that doesn't seem to belong to me, that seemed to be seeping into me 24/7, waking or not, from another dimension, not to mention the constant pressure on my heart and sacral chakra waking or sleeping. I know I said root chakra before, but I didn't know what I was talking about then. I have since read up, and it's the sacral chakra. Sacral.

I'm feeling the pressure today quite strongly, but the only difference is I dont' feel sad, and the anxiety has dissipated into feelings of excitement and anticipation.

I'd like to think maybe I'm getting strong enough to start handling this sexual supercharge from hell. I wonder if my dreams are going to change for the better, or if I will be able to be more conscious in them.

As for energy transformation, I want to make an effort to always keep my efforts small and above all, constant.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Wed Feb 27, 2013 10:49 am 
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Very vague dream from this morning. Objects splitting in two all over the place. The double has very good energy, the original feels neutral. It's as if the double supercedes the original. That's it. It was a brief dream and I can't remember the objects, although I seem to recall that they seemed like geometrical shapes.

I feel normal today.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Wed Feb 27, 2013 12:15 pm 
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One thing I want to come to terms with is my feeling of being torn with respect to keeping in touch with the new energy that seems to seep into me from elsewhere.

At first, it was very distressing. When I was able to cut it off from time to time, I felt relieved and happy, but worried that I'd never be able to connect with it again.

When I reported feeling normal this morning, I was somewhat worried that I would feel normal forever, and never be able to get back in touch with the energy.

On the other hand, I figured I'd only be concerned about this for a few hours max. Then I'd be happy to be back to where I was, becuase I know that I was happy then. So, I concluded that I would just accept that this would fade away, but perhaps leave me with all kinds of new info to integrate.

Nevertheless, I wondered what all these splitting images in my dreams were about, so after this post, I did some more reading about Shamanism.

As soon as I did, it started up again. The energy, the chakras.

So I'm wondering if... perhaps... will I be able to contact this at will? Will I be able to shift back to normal at will? Will I really need to have to go back to normal again, if I can learn to handle this new energy?

Is there a reason for learning to handle it aside from the extra thrills and chills it imparts? Is there more to it than that?


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Wed Feb 27, 2013 8:27 pm 
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So some insights about what to start to do with this energy. I still really don't know what it's for exactly, but I have a glimmering of an idea more than I had before. Not nearly enough to put into words.

I have some ideas about ways to learn more about it.

First is to pay attention to whomever I resonate with in that way, and see if there's a very consistent theme to all of them, in terms of their "energy signature". Are they the kind of people who have so much in common they'd all join the same club, if they had to choose from a list of clubs to join? If so, would I find any among them that I know I could date without regret? Or would they all be Shamans? Priests? Freaks?

The second is paying attention to people I wish I was attracted to, then seeing if there's a way I could use my energy to get in sync with theirs.

Then, could I expand it so that I could imagine making love to everyone?

Think Dennis Hopper in Blue Velvet, just before going on a "joyride" with his "neighbour".

No, just kidding.

What I feel encompasses love and lust, but also goes beyond love and lust. I don't have to possess the beloved in order to love the beloved. And ideally it's even better if I have more than one beloved, that I could feel a love beyond convention for all. Maybe I can.

I can already see why this is a desireable state just for my own selfish needs, yet others would benefit by default.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2013 10:38 am 
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It looks like the dreams are quickly dying down. All I remember from last night is seeing a bunch of small light "objects" exploding on a pitch black canvas. And the Shaman was talking. At this point, all I really want to know is, is it really him, or is it someone/something taking his form?

I feel happy.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2013 2:44 pm 
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Behind the happiness, vague axniety. Behind the vague anxiety, hot hot rage. But I swear I feel it coming from outside and permeating me.

OK, some just got inside me, and my solar plexus heated up in a really pleasant way, plus the sun temporarily got brighter, as soon as my solar plexus chakra lit up.

The outer rage was immediately transformed into something that fed my solar plexus chakra, and the feelings are spreading to my chest and belly warming my heart.

The sun is shining, lighting up the grey sky.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2013 1:48 pm 
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I'm pretty confident the crises has passed. I have no idea what precipitated the beginnings of those dreams, there have been no changes to my life before or after these events.

After everything I've read, I've come to the conclusion that the content of these dreams was raised to the surface to be cleared.

I vaguely remember a dream last night, and the atmosphere was greatly improved. That sense of grey sadness had departed, and things seemed fresh and alive.

I suspect that either someone I know very well and who influenced my life a great deal has died, or some big change is coming up for me, and I'm clearing away stuff in advance.

The third option is that something big is coming up for a lot of people and what I experienced was a foreshadowing of that.

I'm glad the Shaman portal was here to allow me to write it out and work through it. I don't think that this is the end of it, but it seems that it is for now.

As for some people who think I'm just on a self indulgent magical mystery tour, I saw it as taking responsibility for my own crises and my own healing - which is very Shamanic.

When some force is revving up your chakras all day long, and dragging you through astral world dungeons, you try separating your mind and your will from all that. Try to remain sane in the face of that. Something had possession of my body to such an extent that it almost gained posession of my mind and soul. I had to pull myself back and say, "whoever/whatever it is you are, you can do whatever you want to my chakras, my dreams, my body, but my mind is mine."

Thanks again for providing a safe space to grapple with this. If it arises again, I'll be back.

Edited to add, these dream experiences were not the result of sleep paralysis. In fact, I was very surprised that there was no paralysis - relived too, because that would have made it worse.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Tue Mar 05, 2013 10:58 am 
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Slept hard, and through the entire night without waking once. Was awoken by someone talking to me, saying very loud, very clear, that something about my identity is about to be revealed.

Well, hopefully that's good news, or maybe the voice just wants attention, or maybe it's just pre-waking nonsense.

No news is good news if you ask me.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Wed Mar 06, 2013 11:21 am 
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The cats kept me awake on and off last night. They don't do that very often. Had a very brief dream that I walked outside into the snow, but got stuck as the snow was very soon up to my waist and I couldn't move. A woman was walking along my drive way, and I asked her if she could help me out. She told me to just lay down when she pulled me out, so that I could be pulled across the snow to safety, like a human sled. So that's what I did. It was a bright sunny, day. White, white, snow.

Normally I love winter, but this year it feels like I will never see the end of it. I have a new appreciation for summer now. I thought I wanted to spend the rest of my life in the North, but I've changed my mind.

The new goal is Costa Rica.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Tue Mar 19, 2013 10:49 am 
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A few nights ago, I dreamt I was in bed with an ex boyfriend from the deep past. We remained friends long after breaking up, although that has changed over the last six months, mostly due to him pulling away as his life crumbled about his ears. I chased after him for a bit, I wanted to save him from himself, but I just got too tired, and decided to leave him to it.

Anyway, in the dream we were both nekkid and we were just about to engage in that biblical way when I said "no". So we didn't engage and he took it in pretty good humour, except his genitals detached from his body, and were just laying there on the bed, looking quite detached. Maybe he blames me for making him feel castrated. I woke up wondering if he was still in the land of the living. I haven't tried to find out yet. This dream occurred in the midst of a recent depression that gripped me tight over the last week. One of those depressions that make you wish you were dead. Yesterday I turned the corner on that and am feeling well again.

Last night, I dreamt I was in the living room, working out. I had a sense that my invisible man was sleeping in the bedroom. I decided to adjust one of the mirrors on the wall that I use to check for form, when all of a sudden I'm in the backyard, lying in my back, in the snow. It appears to be deep twilight. Very misty, very dark gray. Only this time, I don't feel the gloom that's all around me. At this point I am wondering how I got from my living room, to the back yard, lying in the snow??

I sit up and look for my house, but I can't see it. I then look in the direction opposite my house, and even though I wanted to go back inside, I begin walking in the opposite direction.

In my peripheral vision, I see the exact same, round, mechanical object depicted in an earlier dream, which is detailed in this thread a few posts up. Only this time it's much bigger and stationary. Even though it's not moving, I still can't look at it directly for some reason. It always seems to stay just to the side, and trying to look at it makes me feel very tired.

So, I'm looking ahead in the direction where I don't want to walk, but am walking anyway. At this point I suspect that I am either dead, or am about to be. I ask myself if there is anybody whom I wish were here with me and the answer is my mother. So I call for her, knowing full well she isn't going to answer. Instead, my invisible man shows up and remains invisible. I ask him if he can see the object and tell him that I saw it before, in another dream, only it was much smaller. He concurrs that he can see it.

Here's what it looks likeImage

The implications are a bit frightening. There an invisible man and a webcam stalking me in my dreams...

Suddenly I wake up. As soon as I open my eyes, all three of my cats act very happy to see me. Even the really anti social one who can't stand being stroked comes right up to my face for kisses.

That's the second time that's happened with the cats.

The last time this happened was about a week ago. This time they were all sleeping in the kitchen. The second I opened my eyes, they all raced into the living room, full of joy, happy and playing together, in the middle of the night.

These dreams are preparing me for something, and from the depression and other disturbed moods arising from these dreams, it's likely onerous.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Tue Mar 19, 2013 1:01 pm 
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I forgot to mention that when I awoke after that dream last night, I felt very dizzy and slightly nauseaous. I still feel somewhat light headed, and very groggy. I'm going to do a workout anyway.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Thu Mar 21, 2013 5:28 pm 
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Yesterday morning: Dreamed I was walking with the Queen in a corridor. And I was wearing a brand new, full, longish skirt. It was a positive "up" dream, although I had trouble keeping up with the Queen.

This morning, very early: Dreamed it was during the pitch blackness of night, I opened the front door, and two of my cats raced outside, disappearing into the woods across the street. I am prayin to God they will be safe and that they'll come back home. I don't notice that my black cat isn't in this dream. Just like he wasn't in the last one where I dreamt about my cats.

I woke up right after that. It was still dark, but I couldn't get back to sleep.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Thu Mar 21, 2013 7:00 pm 
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I looked up the dream interpretation for forest. If used as an escape route it suggest the dreamer is overexposed to modern technology. The cats were definitely looking to escape into the forest. So the threat had to be right here in this house. Well, I'm going to do a major spring clean this weekend. Maybe I'll discover something. I hope not though.


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 Post subject: Re: Dreams!!!
 Post Posted: Sat Mar 23, 2013 8:18 am 
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I can't remember what my dream was about. What I do remember is waking up several times during the night, going back to sleep, and the dream picking up from where I left off. I don't remember ever having a dream that continued like that.


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