So yesterday I woke up with a feeling that I have not yet understood. At first I thought the feeling was just something unique to yesterday, and tried to just flow through the day until I returned to normal. But today I am no different. In fact, I would say that I am starting to acclimate to the feeling and it seems to be setting in to stay.
I have noticed distinct changes that have come with this feeling, and I will break them down into three categories: Physical, Mental and Spiritual.
Physical: I feel lighter, as if I'm not carrying some physical weight that I am used to carrying. I also have noticed that when I concentrate on a physical task, I am more accurate than usual, despite my tremors and other physical disruptions.
Mental: I keep spacing out, as if I am not thinking unless I will myself to do so. It is almost as if I have to intend thought for it to happen, which is very strange and different to me. When I concentrate on a task, however, I feel extremely focused and "in the zone".
My perception of time is also changing. At night, when I sleep, it feels as if large amounts of time pass, when in reality, only minutes have. Likewise, when I get into a zone of focus, the time "flies", which is not abnormal, except that it seems to pass quicker than the usual "flying of time". When neither of these aforementioned situations are taking place I feel a sense of timelessness, but my internal time-clock remains accurate and my left-side brain still has not failed to keep me organized.
My emotions are yet another mental change. I have no problem maintaining a positive state of mind, and the usual twang of anger or frustration with the people I typically interact with is gone.
Spiritual: Normally, to do any type of spiritual task, I need to work myself into a state to work that spiritual task. But last night a student at my university who I work with, came to me to release stress and to get help with her emotions. I was able to perform a reiki healing session on the spot with none of the usual preparations, and the effects of the healing were noticeably improved in comparison from the usual results.
Now done to the bulk of why I am posting this. Normally one would say that such immediate progress would feel like empowerment, but yet I feel lighter, and I feel as if something that I normally carry within me is gone. I am thinking maybe some deeply rooted emotional issues have finally cleared away. This is a goal I have been working on for most of the 10 years since I received my calling to Shamanism, but I cannot say I expected a change to happen suddenly instead of the gradual progress I have been making thus far.
Has anyone else had such a large change happen seemingly all at once? Was it a permanent change or did it taper off? What insights can you give on this experience?